The Man That Never Was

    The Man and His Twinkie

    There was a guy his name was get ready for it, it will blow you off your feet. He was on his quest to find the last of the twinkies on Earth because he knew if they could survive a holocaust the could survive going out of business and a apocolypse. He was devastated to find out the twinkie factory went out of business one saturday morning reading the daily paper. He had woke up that morning happy cause it was his day off and he was excited to spend it work free. But when he got his hot cup of Joe and the morning paper and sat at the kitchen table. As he’s reading the paper he says “ There ‘s never really anything good to read about but lets see what’s happening today. As he was flipping through the paper a headline in big, black, and bold read “ NO MORE TWINKIES?”. As he continued reading it said “ It is true the Hostess factory went out of business as of today yes it’s true people no more twinkies”. After he had read that he went into shock the coffee falling out of his hand CRASH the sound of it hitting the floor knocked him out of shock. He passed his house back and forth for 10 minutes saying “ NOOOO we need twinkies the yellow cake with creamy custard in the middle its the perfect snack to have” . So he packed his bags and wrote a letter to his wife saying “ Hey, I’m going to be gone awhile i’m going to the twinkie factory in Atlanta i’ll be back in a bit Love, …..”. So he got into his 2013 Toyota Prius with only $100 to his name but he knew it will be a long road ahead for him cause he lived in. Madison Wisconsin.
         As he’s leaving Madison he had to stop at a diner to use the bathroom but they were only for paying customer’s. So he stared at the menu for 3 mins and the worker said “ How may i help you?” and he replied with “ yea let me get a Boston Kreme”. The worker behind the counter was young she was about 23 years old and she had brown hair with a nicely clean uniform on with a name tag that read Sam. She was nice she also seemed like she was new because when he asked for his order she had to double check to see if they had them. So she says “ sorry sir but we do not have those would you like something else?” and he says “ yea i’ll just get a burger to go” it came out to be $8.50 for the burger so he used the bathroom took his order and left. So he continues his road trip to Atlanta but about a mile away from the diner the traffic came to a dead stop. There was honking and screaming and yelling coming from everywhere. He wanted to know why the traffic had stopped like that but as he slowly goes forward he finds out there was a bad accident. He was in stuck in traffic for 45 mins but to him it felt like 2 hours cause he just wanted to get there already he was a very inpatient man. It turned out there was a car upside down on fire it was really sad and cool at the same time. So he got on on route 679859 headed to Atlanta. He was driving for hours and made it to the bottom of Idaho as he was leaving it was 11 o’clock at night so he got a motel room for $20 a night. So he gets in the room and it was a dump there were stains everywhere the shower was broken and so wasn’t the heater but it was 29 degrees outside. So he slept on the floor snuggling with his pet cockroach that he had no clue where it came from. When he woke up he got his stuff and left right away but his car was trashed because off all the hoodlums outside so he just got in and drove away. He got back onto route 679859 and drove 10 hours straight to Atlanta but since he had a prius he had to stop a couple of times to charge his car like he stopped at one guys house and he plugged it into his house and sat in it for an hour waiting for it to charge. But the owner of the house came home all angry and pissed off because a stranger was charging his car in his property. So after he had explained to him what he was doing the guy wanted to join him on his road trip to Atlanta. So when he was done charging his car it was about 9:30 at night so he decide to drive another 2 hours. But they started to get tired so they pulled into a motel in a little town named Ringgold in northern Georgia he had about $70 left but the room was $40 so it just left him with $30 for food. As he’s entering the room he turns on the light as the other guy runs for the bathroom. After they were settled they notice there was only one bed so one of them had to sleep on the floor so they fought over the bed. But they didn’t know how to solve this situation so they played rock,paper, scissors they played best of three but his tag along won. So he had to sleep on the floor for the second night in a row but this motel was cleaner than the other one so he didn’t mind. When they woke up the next morning they went out for breakfast but they didn’t have much money so they got Mcdonalds. But breakfast came out to $10 and he had $20 left but he had another 150 miles left to drive to Atlanta. So his car was almost dead on battery charge and he didn’t to stop and charge it so he spent $10 on gas after he got the gas he had another 100 miles lift so he was so excited. So he spends another 2 hours driving with his buddy then he sees a sign that says welcome to Atlanta he got so stoked for the twinkies. But he asked 3 different people for directions to the company and when he got there it was locked. So they broke the lock with a rock and as he’s opening the door the smile on his face gets bigger and bigger because he sees these boxes stacked like 10 ft high. So he quickly drops the rock and sprint to a box and doesn’t waste anytime opening it. But when he reached in to pull something out he pulled out little debbies fudge round cakes. And that man was so disappointed he started to cry cause he drove hundreds of miles and 2 and a half days to this company half the time with a stranger. And that guys name was Merle.

                            The End!!!!!!